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Writer's pictureRani

Christchurch. The City of Cycles and Road Rage.

Christchurch has (at least since I've lived here) been known as the City of Cycles because apparently everyone cycles literally everywhere. Well, guess what fellow Cantabrians! We are now the City of Road Rage as well! A new survey was released by the AA saying we are, as a city, the most likely to experience road rage.


Now, I'm not going to accept this survey as truth just because it's the AA. I mean, I sat my Learner Licence test at an AA and I got one question wrong which I refuse to admit was wrong, by the way. The test was wrong and that's all there is to it (I know I'm not helping the road rage survey results for us by saying that) and I'm completely right. Even though the AA gets things wrong, I'm not going to completely shrug this off and pretend it never existed either.

To support my case, I would like to just mention something. Have you seen the state of the roads in this city? You used to drive on Bealey Avenue and then end up with scoliosis. It doesn't help that, because we are the City of Cycles, you have more mobile chicanes (A.K.A. cyclists) than you do motorists on State Highway One.


Oh, wait... Finn (Major Mong) in Dunedin said you can just walk around the city. I mean, we would if we could find a single park that was free. It's almost a blessing to pay an arm and a leg for a car park within a kilometre of where you want to end up. Don't even get me started on free parking in this city because that does not exist in Christchurch. It is almost cheaper to live in New York than it is to park anywhere near Oxford Terrace.

Alright, so... I get it. We have bad road rage here. It's sort of understandable. Christchurch has had a rough few years with a rebuild that goes nowhere outside of the CBD, a hospital parking system that makes cutting off a leg more economical than going to the Emergency Department (I don't actually recommend cutting your leg off... just got to our new ED) and then, every Friday and Saturday, the four, but actually five avenues (I won't ever forget about you, Harper Ave).


If you don't like the road rage here, don't drive. Also, if your road rage is particularly likely to go viral, send it to me. I'd love to feature you and experience second-hand embarrassment.






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